Ask Jigsaw: Frustrated and lonely

Friday, 09 October 2020

I feel very frustrated and lonely most of the time because i can’t express my problems to anyone i know. At school i only have one or two friends that im not that close to, and i cant tell my family either because ive tried to, but they dont understand me and it frustrates me.

Even if i had close friends, i wouldnt want to open up because in previous friendships it hasnt helped me (to open up) and they never understand anyway.

The problems are about being really anxious, feeling sad and disoriented very often and a lot of negative feelings. I feel lonely because its like im on my own and i cant turn to anyone for help

Epalios

Hi Epalios,

I’m sorry to hear how difficult things have been. Feeling sad, feeling anxious and experiencing loneliness are some of the main reasons young people come to Jigsaw, so know that you’re not alone in feeling this way. Without a doubt, friendships can have a big impact on how we feel.

Opening up

Opening up to people about our problems can be a difficult thing to do. Even more so if you’ve had a bad experience with telling your friends and family before. It sounds like you have been trying your best to manage things by yourself. However, there comes a time in everyone’s life where they need some extra support.

If you don’t feel comfortable opening up to a family member like a parent, is there an adult in school like a year head or a school councillor that you could talk to? There are ways of asking for support that can make it a bit easier.

Hazel

Jigsaw clinician

Sometimes when we keep our struggles to ourselves for a long time, we are fooled into thinking that things will never improve. In reality, there are lots of services out there that can help.

Support options

You deserve to have someone to turn to for help. Sometimes when we keep our struggles to ourselves for a long time, we are fooled into thinking that things will never improve. In reality, there are lots of services out there that can help you get to a better place and you might find it easier opening up to a professional.

Depending on where you are based, you might be able to access a Jigsaw service. Or there are a number of other services available too available for under 18’s and over 18’s. If you are under 18, you will need parental consent. You mentioned your family don’t understand you, but they don’t need to understand you to be able to get you the support you deserve.

Help to decide

It can be difficult to decide if further support is something that you want. You are welcome to use the Jigsaw Live Chat service, where you can talk more about your situation, learn some ways to manage your feelings and explore some options together with a member of the Jigsaw Online Team.

Take care,

Hazel

Jigsaw clinician