Managing social media and screen time
Managing social media and screen time
Learn simple ways to set healthy boundaries for your teen’s screen time and social media use.
There’s a lot of chat about the ‘dangers’ of social media and screen time for adolescents. This article will outline ways for you to set boundaries about screen time and social media, but won’t discuss any specific apps or platforms.
Social media isn’t always the problem
Before social media was the scapegoat for moody teenagers, it was video games. Before that, it was rock music. There’s always been something to point the finger at. But, the truth is: social media is a reflection of reality.
If your child is coming away from their screen time feeling upset or uncomfortable, it’s likely they’ve seen something that’s been upsetting them anyway. It could be bullying at school, or climate change, or some other aspect of society they’ve been struggling with. So it’s important to keep an eye on them and their behaviours, and say you’ve noticed they feel a specific way after going online.
Don’t judge or shame them
If you want your child to come to you if they stumble upon something they shouldn’t have, make sure you never judge them. Your child needs to know you’ll support them and help them cope.
Don’t make comments about how they’re ‘always on their phones’, or ‘glued to their screens’. This could cause them to feel like they’ll get in trouble if they admit they’ve seen something they shouldn’t have. Keep checking in with them, ask them what they’re watching, or watch it with them.
Be a role model for behaviour
If you tell your child they can’t use their phone at specific times while you’re using yours, it could lead to disagreements. If you act the way you want your child to, it can be easier for them to see the example you’re setting.
Having the same rules for everyone in the house will make your child feel less like they’re in trouble. For example, you could disallow phone usage at dinner or mealtimes, and make everyone leave their phones, tablets and laptops in the kitchen at bedtime.
It’s never too late to impose boundaries
It might seem like you can’t undo what you’ve done, but you absolutely can.If you’ve given your child their own phone, or increased their screen time but realised it’s not working for them, you can change the rules.
Remember, your children only have access to the internet because of you. While it’s not necessarily recommended, you can confiscate their phones or unplug the WiFi as a last resort. But, whatever you do, it’s important to explain to your child why you’re doing it. They are more likely to co-operate if they understand your reasons behind doing something.
Social media and technology is always evolving
If you feel out of your depth with the speed of apps, social media sites and all the trends your child is coming across, that’s totally normal. I’m sure if you asked other parents, they’d feel the exact same way! Everything is moving so fast, and just as you get to grips with one thing, it’s already not cool anymore.
When you were growing up, social media was either non-existent or in the very early stages. But, one thing is for certain: you didn’t have completely unlimited access to the internet (you probably had to use the family PC). And your parents probably didn’t have a clue about the new online cultural discourse you were part of.
Social media and screen time aren’t always negative
It’s important to remember that not all screen time or social media is bad. There are a lot of educational resources online, and your children can get the benefits of these. And, for young people growing up in more rural areas, if they can connect with people with similar interests online, it’s a way for them to feel less isolated.
One of the most important things is that you engage with what your child is doing online. So, sit and watch their videos with them, or play their games with them. They’ll know you’re trying, and interested, and if you try their game and aren’t good, they’ll get a buzz out of laughing at you!
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