Christmas can be the most wonderful or the most stressful time of the year, depending on your situation and outlook. Expectations can be high around this time of year and minding your own mental health should be a priority.
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Christina, 24, a Jigsaw volunteer from Dublin shares her experience of goal setting.
With the year we’ve all had, having to put a lot of our daily lives on pause for a little while, it’s been difficult to keep focused at times. I find that setting goals for myself always helps me get back on track.
Boundaries demonstrate what we think is acceptable, or unacceptable, in peoples’ behaviour towards us. Establishing boundaries can be a way of protecting ourselves.
To help in this article we cover:
Shaun talks about his experience of getting support from Jigsaw.
Over the lockdown restrictions, we were asked to stay at home where possible. This was really challenging if home was not somewhere safe.
Domestic violence can happen in any type of relationship, no matter what your age, gender or sexuality. It can also happen in any family, regardless of culture, status or financial situation.
If you have experienced domestic violence you are not alone. One study by the National Crime Council has shown 15% of women and 6% of men in Ireland have been subjected to domestic abuse.
Domestic violence is not your fault, and help is available. Both local and national services are still open and offering support, despite the pandemic.
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when I feel a negative feeling like anger, sadness or loneliness. I always feel so guilty and overall stupid for having those feelings because I know that I have had a pretty okay life compared to those who in the world who have suffered from so much pain and hurt that they didn’t deserve.
But I was just wondering is it normal to feel your feelings are not valid and unimportant? I just think I have always had some sort of just a numbness in my heart that I’ve just gotten used to, so any different feeling to that numb feeling is followed by guilt. I am grateful that I’m here everyday though. Just its something I think about all the time and I had to ask. Thank You
-chico093
Hi Chico093,
I can tell from your question that you are a very thoughtful, caring, self-aware person. Your question is actually something we hear a good bit at Jigsaw and something that many young people struggle with.
I feel very frustrated and lonely most of the time because i can’t express my problems to anyone i know. At school i only have one or two friends that im not that close to, and i cant tell my family either because ive tried to, but they dont understand me and it frustrates me.
Even if i had close friends, i wouldnt want to open up because in previous friendships it hasnt helped me (to open up) and they never understand anyway.
The problems are about being really anxious, feeling sad and disoriented very often and a lot of negative feelings. I feel lonely because its like im on my own and i cant turn to anyone for help
Epalios
Why do I feel like I am wasting my youth? My entire family has struggled with massive drug and alcohol addiction so I try to stay away from it, but it feels like I’m wasting my youth. I’m so afraid that I’m going to look back at this time in my life and be full of regret.
-Elle
Hi Elle,
Worrying about future regrets can have a big impact on the choices we make in the moment. The fear of regret can make us question even our strongest values.
It can seem like everyone else has found their group and is fitting in at school. We can end up feeling very lonely and isolated when we don’t feel we fit in.
If you feel like you don’t fit in, you’re not on your own. According to My World Survey 2, over one in five young people considered friends to be a source of stress. 39% of adolescents reported that they had experienced bullying at some point in their lives.
As we get older, we tend to spend much less time with family and more time with friends. For many young people, fitting in is really important. It seems that everybody wants to be popular. This can lead to social rivalry, competition and bullying, particularly in school.
When you feel like you don’t fit in, it can be an extremely tough experience. There are no easy answers, but some of the following may help.
Hi Jigsaw,
I have just found out that all of my college lectures will be online. As a result, I will not be moving out. I’m very stressed and upset about this. I feel living with my family has resulted in the deterioration of my mental health. I can’t talk to my parents about it, as they are the source of this stress. Also I will very rarely see my friends. Any recommendations on managing this?
-Disa22
Hi Disa22,
College life will be very different this year. We’ve heard from many young people who are feeling disappointment, stress, and anger because they are missing out on experiences that everyone else took for granted.
