Ask Jigsaw: Thinking about meaning of life

i’ve been feeling not myself and thinking a lot about the meaning of life. i just don’t see a point if we all die in the end. i don’t want to die but i can’t stop constantly thinking about what is the point of anything.

i also keep thinking about what happens after death, is that it for everyone- that we just cease to exist. i haven’t thought about life this way before and i don’t like thinking about it this way but is it all that it is.

-9999

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out, those are some big questions that many of us grapple with.

Nicole’s story: Support for anxiety

Originally reported by RTE, Nicole, who is a Jigsaw volunteer, was interviewed to discuss youth mental health in the context of her own life.

This conversation was sparked by the release of My World Survey 2, carried out by UCD in conjunction with Jigsaw, which surveyed more than 19,000 young people in Ireland.

Nicole’s story

Nicole began experiencing feelings of anxiety when she started secondary school. Nicole is 17 years old and is from Co Offaly.

“Anxiety is a big challenge. From secondary school it became a big part of my life … it feels like pressure, but like built up, or like panic. It’s hard to explain but its overwhelming,” she said.

Being around large crowds of people could ignite her feelings of anxiety.

 

Racism and mental health

Although Ireland is known for being friendly and welcoming, racism does happen here.

Too often in Jigsaw we hear from young people about the negative impact racism has on their mental health. We hear of experiences ranging from discrimination to physical violence. It’s important that we are aware of the impact of this and act to challenge racism when we can.

Jigsaw is part of the Irish Network Against Racism. We are committed to challenging racism and supporting young people who are affected by it.

Sarah’s story: Managing exam stress

Sarah* contacted Jigsaw about four months before her Leaving Cert exams. She had been feeling anxious for a while, but in the last few weeks she’d had two panic attacks.

Her main worry was that she’d get a panic attack in an exam. “I have to get rid of this anxiety now”, she told the clinician, “before my mocks”.

Identifying triggers for stress

Sarah’s clinician wanted to know more about the anxiety and panic attacks. When did they happen? Was there a trigger? They discovered Sarah’s panic attacks happened just after Sarah’s teachers mentioned study plans or expected study hours in class.

When her history teacher said, “you all should have covered this section in your revision plan already”, Sarah felt her heart beating fast and chest getting tight. She rushed to the toilet because she felt she couldn’t breathe. She barely remembers the rest of the day.

The Jigsaw clinician helped Sarah realise her panic attacks were connected to worries she was too far behind on study. She thought she’d never be able to catch up.

This connected to deeper worries of failing her exams, being unable to get into college or ever getting a job. That would lead her to be a “complete failure” in life. The clinician asked her to step back, look at the facts and be realistic about what could happen. They discussed strategies for managing exam stress.

Together they looked at Sarah’s schedule. The clinician asked Sarah to draw out her weekly calendar. She coloured in the hours she spent studying as blue, with different colours for other activities. When she was finished, Sarah’s waking hours were almost completely blue.

Emily’s story: Living with an essential worker

Emily, 18, a Jigsaw volunteer from Donegal gives us her story: As the daughter of an essential worker, I’ve come to recognise that quitting time is non-existent these days for some workers. 

Dinner time is rarely a shared occasion.  As I write this, she’s on phone call number two of the day, on her day off.  This is the new normal for myself, and a lot of other young people living with an essential worker during this pandemic.

Dealing with the stress of it all

For many young adults in Ireland over the past few months, there has been additional stress added to the fact that they are living through a global pandemic.  For some, almost overnight, they have gained a new responsibility, not only for themselves but for siblings and other family members too, because their parents have been occupied with helping to fight the ongoing crisis.  For myself, as well as trying to keep on top of college work, I have been looking after my five younger siblings.  This includes doing washing, tidying up the house and making sure they are all fed and watered, as well as checking in to make sure they are ok with their schoolwork.  This has been stressful and frustrating at times, but overall very rewarding to know that the pressure is taken off my mammy somewhat when she gets home from work in the evenings.

I have found a few different ways of working in order to help myself and the others in my house as much as possible.  My hope is that by sharing them, I can help other young people that find themselves in the same situation as myself.  They include:

Planning

Even if it is just a basic list of things I need to do the next day, writing a list always helps me to stay motivated and keep going throughout the day to get as much done as I can.

Five a day for your mental health

Based on the ‘Five Ways to Wellbeing‘ report 2008 by the New Economics Foundation (NEF), here are five things you can do daily for your mental health.

The UK Government commissioned the NEF to develop a simple set of evidence-based actions for people to improve their wellbeing. NEF drew on a very broad base of research for their recommendations, from psychological to economic literature.

Supporting the transition to secondary school

The transition to secondary school is a big milestone in a young person’s life. Although exciting, it can also throw up challenges. 

Young people have been in and out of school due to lockdowns. Experiences of school closures are varied, some young people have been relieved and others have really missed school.

Uncertainty about the future can influence a young person’s move to secondary school. Fortunately, as a parent, there is a lot you can do to support their mental health during this process.

Ask Jigsaw: I feel lonely at school

What do I do when no one at school likes me and when I feel lonely at school and have no one to go to and don’t want to go to a counsellor or a teacher because you feel they aren’t helpful.

RedLight2

Hi RedLight2,

I am sorry that you are feeling so lonely and you haven’t found that anyone has been helpful. School can be really tough at times. It can seem that some people make friends easily and find their ‘tribe’ straight away. However, for some of us, fitting in is more challenging and school can amplify our sense of loneliness.

Ask Jigsaw: Don’t want to go back to counselling

Hey, this isnt even a question but ive been feeling so odd recently and its impacting my behaviour, like my eating habits are all over the place, I’m either crying or really feel like crying every evening and my relationship with my family hasnt been great either.

I tried counselling before and it didn’t really work out for me that well at the time… and when i told the counsellor about my eating habits, they said they think its due to anxiety?? but i don’t know what i’m anxious about??

i acc dunno what to do but I don’t think i want to go back to counselling, as i don’t want to have to deal with emotions or things from my past resurfacing, if that makes any sense? I’m kinda afraid that things are a lot worst than i try to think they are but i’m also aware that fixing that would take ages and i just don’t want to feel worse before i can feel better?

thanks x

xoxo

Hi xoxo,

I can hear a lot of pain and confusion in your message. It sounds like your mental health has been having a negative effect on many aspects of your life, including your relationships.