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Ask Jigsaw: Divorce affecting eating habits

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

My parents told me they were getting a divorce before lockdown, i told only 1 of my friends since quarantine. they have been living in the same house. i feel alone sometimes.

a few days ago my brother found out that my father was with another woman. he blamed me. for the last month i have been exercising and weighing myself everyday ive been counting calories and weighing my food .i dont know how to deal with the divorce but ive began to become obsessed with food and its leaving me tired and hungry.

-Henan

Hi Henan,

I’m sorry that your parents are separating during an already very difficult time. When parents’ divorce, we can feel a number of intense emotions including anger, relief, and sadness. There is certainly no right or wrong way to react.  It sounds like you could be managing this intense situation by trying to control your food intake.

Ask Jigsaw: I want to start loving myself

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

I’ve been told I might be suffering from body dysmorphia and I can see the signs, but despite that I seem to be getting worse? It’s gone to the point where I tear up when I see a recent picture of myself..and I do want to start loving myself but it’s just really hard to. I’ve been thinking of making an appointment, but I’m really scared of face to face interaction. I’m scared of my anxiety since it’s really hard for me to talk to strangers especially when I have to bring up my concerns.. Any recommendations on what I should do? 

– zwolfxo 

Hi zwolfxo, 

Sounds like it’s been really tough for you recently, but you did the right thing to reach out! At different points throughout life, body image can become more, or less important. But there’s no doubt that being unhappy with your physical body can have a big impact on your mental health.  

Ask Jigsaw: My partner is depressed

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

Im concerned for my partner he has depression and is depressed now and just wants to be alone due to the lockdown im not with him and its killing us i don’t know how to help him, I ring him often to check up on him and i told him im here for him, i have anxiety myself please give me some advice.

-Bluebells

Hi Bluebells,

It takes a lot of strength to support a loved one when they are going through difficulties. It’s even more challenging at a time like this, when we are forced to be apart and may also be struggling with our own mental health. It sounds like you are doing your best to let your partner know that you are there for them. Covid-19 restrictions make it impossible to support others the way that we might want to. It can be helpful to acknowledge that, and accept that we are doing what we can.

Ask Jigsaw: No longer have a reason to live

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

What should I do if I no longer have any reason to live and the only reason I am still here is for my family’s sake?

Jay

Hi Jay,

I’m sorry to hear that you can’t find many reasons to live. In darker times, it can be difficult to find any reason to live. When we are suffering with great pain, surviving each day can be a tremendous effort. Unfortunately, there are many people who struggle with feelings like yours. Remember that you are not alone. Pieta House offers free counselling, both in person and online, to those who are dealing with thoughts of wanting to die. Their helpline is available 24/7 on 1800247247 or text HELP to 51444.

Supporting mental health while social distancing

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

Social distancing measures we need to take to prevent the spread of Coronavirus will no doubt have an impact on our mental health.

Our clinical team in Limerick are staying in touch through Zoom for team meetings. Here they discuss what in particular they are finding difficult, but also how they are looking after their own mental health and what you can do too.

Ask Jigsaw: How do you recognise emotional abuse?

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

How can you tell when your being emotionally abused?

– Idkhelpmepls:)

Hi Idkhelpmepls:),

Recognising emotional abuse can be complicated. It can have lots of different names, like verbal or mental abuse, and it might have different meanings for different people. It’s really important to explore if we are being abused by someone so that we can protect ourselves, and get the necessary support.

Emotional abuse is systematic emotional or psychological ill-treatment by someone in our lives. It can be perpetrated by a parent, partner, carer or someone else that we have a relationship with. It can include manipulation, humiliation, aggression and intimidation that occurs over a period of time. We might notice warning signs in a relationship that could indicate it is becoming abusive.

Ask Jigsaw: No one to talk to

Posted on by Eve Donnelly

I’m sick of pretending that everything’s ok when I’m hurting so bad and I have no one to talk to I’m just so alone and wish I had someone to turn to what should I do since I have no one to talk to.

– Mary

Hi Mary,

I’m sorry to hear that things are so hard for you right now and you feel so alone. It is great that you want to talk about what is going on, and recognise the importance of this. It is not always easy to know who the best person is to talk to however. While some people might have a really obvious ‘one good adult’ in their life, for some of us it might take a bit more figuring out.

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